Samuel Pirro takes his readers into a world that few people have experienced. One follows follows Peter DiNacio through a very poor and dysfunctional childhood laced with abuse. The stage is set for Peter to have relationship problems as he constantly struggles to find acceptance. He shows us what being mentally ill and poor can produce: a hard life in which one has trouble believing in the American dream as well as believing in oneself. He takes the reader through a maze of mean street people, cops, and family members. Yet, in the midst of this harsh world, the poor give their last to each other. He portrays the helplessness of the lost. In spite of Peter's massive problems, he constantly strives to find that elusive happiness, purpose, and self-worth.
Peter is obsessed with his therapist, Leah. He vacillates between lust and what he perceives is love: that longing for connection and total validation. She understands this, whereas Peter does not. He has an on again/off again relation with her in both real life and in his head. As a driving force in his writing, she is his tether to substance. Leah recognizes his great genius and thus feeds into Peter's acceptance of himself as a worthy person. Through his writing, Peter moves from the gutter of life to higher ground because it produces hope, but more importantly, it produces dreams. Peter's childhood and early adulthood destroyed so many of his dreams; he lived in a world devoid of them. That was his hell. The human spirit can endure and overcome when dreams fire the imagination with possibilities. This is a story of triumph as Peter accepts his place in life: a voice who cries in the wilderness of poverty, mental illness, and despair. Through his voice and talent, he learns to love himself. This in turn, leads to his recovery.
I am a woman living in Alabama, suffering from bipolar illness. This book is so "real" for anyone who wishes to understand what it is like to be influenced by one's moods, or how they exacerbate problems in life. This is a must read. I understand now that being mentally ill and poor vs. mentally ill and middle class are far different. I also understand the biggest influence in Peter's life was his lack of a support group, such as friends or family. This haunting truth Sam tells so eloquently in narrative form.