When I had my psychotic episode, for which I ended up first in jail detention and then in the hospital, I got in contact with a selected number of friends and acquaintances. I contacted them both to commiserate and see how could they be of help. I must say with a few exceptions, my gay and lesbian friends and acquaintances that found about my situation responded tremendously well. They visited me at the hospital, they called me on the phone or took my phone calls, or they made phone calls or wrote letters on my behalf, among other kinds of demonstrations of concern and affection. And they all sincerely asked that I keep them abreast of my situation and progress.
I fondly recall a phone call I made to a gay friend who works on a Spanish newspaper in the City. He hadn't heard from me in a long, long time. I told him about my situation. "Fine." I needed something from the paper's archive. "My God, yes Eric, anything I can do. And please, if there is any other way that I can help, let me know." And like him, others have been always there for me, asking how they can be of help, and helping when they could.
I'm not one to concentrate on the negative, and I'm not one to overwhelm my friends with my problems, but I do not hesitate to ask for help when I need it, or provide help when it is asked of me. Here I feel compelled to also say that I have a wonderful and caring family who have been tremendously loving and supportive of me in my new situation! My experience with mental illness has been, above all, a very humbling experience and, certainly, a learning experience. Believe me, I have learned to swallow my pride and accept my predicament with dignity, nonetheless.
And to be honest with you, two of the things I will forever carry with me for the rest of my life are the many life stories of recovery that I have witnessed and the so many wonderful new friends that I have made in the consumer community. The mental health community is one of the most beautiful communities that I have come in contact with. I have met some of the most humblest and sincerest people that I have met anywhere. I feel proud to be consumer just like I feel proud to be Puerto Rican, American, and Gay.
I view my life in two stages: pre-mental illness and post-mental illness. To me -- and I know this to be true in most consumers -- my experience with mental illness has been a life-changing and life-defining experience.
Some of my gay friends no longer try to engage me in gay activists' issues because they know my interests and priorities have shifted. One thing that I will do, though, is to help my friends in the gay community to understand consumer issues. I want them to get to know our issues, our concerns, our particular situations and I also want them to know the same wonderful people that I have come to know in the consumer community.
I think my gay and lesbian friends will be receptive to the plight of a community that -- like the gay community -- has been and still is discriminated against. I have always said there are many faces to mental illness and in all the faces of mental illness -- the ones who have never been through hospitalization, the ones who have, the ones who are working, the ones who aren't, the ones who have excelled in a profession, the ones who haven't, the ones who graduated from college, the ones who have never been to college, the ones who are consumer advocates, the ones who are just consumers, the ones who have difficulty functioning, and the ones who have, unfortunately, had trouble with the law -- in all those faces of mental illness I have mostly seen something in common: Good will and the desire to be a good citizen of this country of ours.
To those gays, Lesbians, Bisexuals and Transgender human beings who are also consumers of mental health, I say only one thing: we are members of two wonderful communities. Let us shine in both of them. Happy Gay Pride and happy Gay Parade! Just one final thought that comes to mind: How about a Consumer Parade down Fifth Avenue? Now, that would be something that would educate a few fellows in this city.