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I always thought one had to work full-time to be fully recovered from mental illness, but that is not true. Some people like volunteering, working part-time or temporarily as long as it is productive and does not hold a great amount of stress for them. For me, recovery means taking care of my health and that is what I choose to do for myself.

When I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder (manic depression), I thought to myself: “I will never recover, never have a meaningful relationship with someone, never be able to work.” It took a while for my psychiatrist to find the right medications for me, and when he did it was like a miracle. I no longer heard voices in my head, or went on shopping sprees, became more alert and relaxed and better able to sleep at night.

I also see a therapist to help me cope with daily living problems. As I continued treatment, I found that there were services available for me to build up my strength and character, to have a social life and be able to work at a level that is comfortable for me. These services came from organizations such as NAMI (National Alliance for Mentally Ill), VESID (Vocational and Educational Services for Individuals with Disabilities), and the Friendship Network, a group that helped me meet and befriend other consumers.

One of the major things important to me was working, so I contacted VESID. They enrolled me at the Long Island Jewish Supported Employment Program where I received a job coach to help me with resumes, interview skills, and to decide on whether or not to disclose my disability to a potential employer. In June 1997, I got a full-time job as a medical billing clerk where my job coach assisted me in disclosing my disability to my employer. It was very difficult for me to adjust to full-time work, and I soon realized that this was not the right job for me. In order to be a medical biller, one must get people to pay their bills. I did not have the personality for this kind of work. I felt very depressed, and even though my job coach and everyone else begged me to stay, I quit.

I decided to take a year off and do some volunteering with the New York City Board of Education as a paraprofessional and I tried working as a substitute special education teacher. I went back to VESID and two years later my girlfriend told me that Bramson Ort College was hiring ESL (English as second language) tutors on a part-time basis. I sent my resume, was interviewed and hired immediately.

I got transferred to a part-time clerical job for the Tutorial and English departments. I decided to disclose my illness after being with them for almost two years, and loving the college. I was known as a student/faculty clerical assistant. I helped out when they had special events, and within the library. I kept in touch with my job coach on a weekly basis to let her know how things were going. She used to go to the college herself and knew most of the people.

I have also done a variety of volunteer work within the mental health field. In July 1999, my first article in New York City Voices was published titled, “My Fears In Overcoming Bipolar Disorder.” On July 16, 2000, I hosted an event in my synagogue that dealt with stigmas toward the mentally ill. About forty people came to the event, and the temple was completely packed. Temple volunteers helped arrange the refreshments and design the flyers while I arranged for the speakers from Community Access, a non-profit agency for those with psychiatric disabilities.

I wrote an article for the Jewish Week about this event because it was important for Jews to know more about mental illness and the struggles that the mentally disabled go through. On May 7, 2001, I organized a mental health forum at Bramson Ort College with the help of the Dean of Students and the director of the English Department. On June 1, 2001 I was part of a panel and spoke about my illness and road to recovery at Holliswood Hospital.

I belong to NAMI-NYC Metro and NAMI Queens/Nassau. At NAMI Queens/Nassau, I joined the Friendship Network where I was introduced to a nice group of people. The Friendship Network plans activities for their members such as tennis, bowling, barbecues, nutrition workshops, schmooze groups, etc. NAMI has monthly meetings on a variety of topics and support groups for family members and consumers, which I attend from time to time.

We hope that one day there will be a cure, but until then we must struggle to recover in order to build successful lives for ourselves and for our families.