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During my 23 years (so far) of battling my major depressive disorder, I have taken a total of 26 different anti-depressant, anti-anxiety and anti-psychotic medications (Yes, I counted). Their names range from some of the more elder statesmen of medications (Haldol, Mellaril, Thorazine) to some of the newer babies and toddlers on the block (Zyprexa, Effexor).

Most of these "anti" medications did not help me at all. In fact, most ended up being "anti-Kurt" medications due to side effects such as sedation, lethargy, weight gain and, my favorite, sexual dysfunction. One anti-anxiety medication I took actually increased my anxiety.

When I went through my most severe depression in 1998, not a single medication helped. Only after receiving my first six Electro-Convulsive Therapy (ECT) treatments did my nearly yearlong depression begin to lift

Now, despite the preceding three paragraphs, it might come as a surprise that I am a full-fledged, 100% proponent of medications. The following are my reasons why:

First of all, I've met a great many people at support groups and other functions who have told me that medications were the main, or, in some cases, the only factor which has helped them in their recovery from depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, obsessive-compulsive disorder and other types of mental illness. A few people have even told me that without their medication they would probably be dead by now.

The second reason I give for supporting the use of medications is that, although I've given you my negative experiences with them in earlier paragraphs, I've also had positive experiences. Although I must admit that I have not had as much success with medications as many other people with mental illness, I'd like to share with you some of the times medications have definitely helped me.

In 1979 I had my first "break," and was hospitalized for having severe suicidal thoughts. At that time I was given the medication Mellaril. Although at first the dosage given to me was too high, causing a slight problem with sedation, I have to say that it did help tremendously to lessen my suicidal thoughts at that time.

In 1984, I experienced my first bout with manic-depression. I had been depressed before, but never experienced the extreme fluctuations in mood as I did then. The lithium I was given at the time, while not affecting the depression in general, completely controlled the mania, which meant I was able to, for the first time since the mania appeared, stop the illegal schemes I was perpetrating and actually get more than two hours of sleep a night. Another positive example I can give is with my current medications. Although the ECT treatments were the biggest help in fighting my major depression in 1998, it was the combination of Lorazepam and Effexor that has helped to keep me reasonably stable since that time. Thanks to these medications, I haven't required any additional ECT treatments since the year 2000. As far as problems with medications are concerned, by far the one I hear mentioned more often than any other is the problem of adverse side effects. In my opinion, the problem is not the side effects themselves, but in the attitude of some psychiatrists towards their patients' concerns. To illustrate this point, I will give you two examples from personal experience. One is the wrong way for a psychiatrist to handle a patient's concern about side effects and another demonstrating the proper way.

The first example took place when I was on a certain medication, which caused me to gain 40 pounds in just two months even though I had never had a weight problem before in my life. When I told my then psychiatrist of this problem, his response was: "Well, there's really nothing we can do. Let's just be satisfied that it is helping your depression." Needless to say, the problems of weight gain continued.

My other example has to do with a medication that I was taking at 75 milligrams. Although the medication was helping my depression, my libido suddenly went south, to the point that my sex drive was almost non-existent. When I saw my psychiatrist and told him of the problem. He recommended that we try a minor decrease in dosage and promised that if this adjustment didn't work we would try other options, such as gradually weaning off this medication and adding another, all under close monitoring. Fortunately, the slight decrease in dosage was enough to bring back my libido while maintaining its depression-fighting qualities. If I would have still been with the initial psychiatrist I'm sure he would have told me to stay on the 75 milligrams and live with the side effects.

So, to answer the question in the article's title, medications are definitely an ally, but are most effective when you have an ally in your psychiatrist as well.